"God is most glorified in you when you are most satisfied in him in the midst of loss, not prosperity." --John Piper

Saturday, May 8, 2010

A Long Journey (Part 13) The Story Continues

When I last blogged about my journey, I was leaving the ministry and getting a divorce. It was not my choice outright, although I had contributed to the outcome by focusing more on my job than on my family. But I did not force her to have an affair, I wasn't even aware of the affair at that point, and I was not the one who was pursuing the divorce. But in a no-fault divorce state, that doesn't matter.


I remember the day she came back from her parents in Florida. I was informed that she had filed a restraining order, and that the police were on the way to serve it. I only had a few minutes to gather some things and leave the house, unable to return until who knows when.


My first thought was to spend the night at my office at the church. I had left her the checkbook because she had my son to take care of. Instead, I ended up in the next town over at the house of a man who was a friend, fellow minister, and a man of God. He took me in for that night, and into his family for several nights after that, about 2 months actually. That was how long it took me to decide what to do next.


Divorce is costly. In the area I was in, the best I was gonna to was $7 an hour in a local factory. So I signed up to Truck Driver Training, and learned to drive a big-rig. Life on the road. 15 days of training and a new career. It was an answer to prayer in many ways and a curse in others.


Driving a big-rig is a lonely job. I lived in that truck for weeks at a time. I was fortunate on trips through Indiana, if I was close enough, I would stop and see my son and maybe even spend a day or two in my friends basement, sleeping in an easy chair with my son on a mattress on the floor.


Driving was limited to 60 hours a week (give or take) due to hours of service limitations. Weeks are 24 X 7 = 168 hours. So that left about 100 hours a week for sleeping, eating, and existing. A lot of that time was spent with a Bible and a journal. I wish I still had those journals, but maybe it is best that I don't.


God is a lot easier to cling to when there is nothing else to hold on to.


I grew a lot during that time. Not enough, but a lot. I still had a lot to learn, and God was going to teach it to me. Often it was going to be the hard way, for some reason I get that a lot. I think it has something to do with my pig-headedness.


Next time: Leaving the Road, Sort of.

No comments: